And
now a few words from the sponsor...
April –
2005
Donna
Renes tries on a big pair of klompen in Doetinchem, the town where
her daughter, Amy, is living during her year as an exchange student
in the Netherlands.
A
typical street in Amsterdam features row houses, a canal, bikes and
boats. The city has a population of about 722,000.
Amy is away from her computer this week, so I agreed to
write her article (What are mother's for?) When I say that she’s
away from her computer, actually she is on a week-long class trip to
Sicily, Italy. She had the choice of going to either Italy, Spain or
Hungary. It was a difficult decision, but as you recall, she had
originally planned to go to Italy as an exchange student before the
switch was made to the Netherlands, so she chose Italy.
I’m still trying to figure out why we
couldn’t have field trips like that when I was in high school!
Of course, I didn’t spend my junior year in the Netherlands
either, so that may have made a difference.
Anyway, Amy and I thought it would be interesting
and informative for you to hear a parent’s perspective on
having a child as an exchange student for a year. That way, when your
16-year old comes up to you and says, “Mom and dad, I want to
spend my junior year of high school in (fill in the name of some
faraway country),” you’ll know what to expect.
The first thing you can expect is tears. No matter
how much you prepare yourself for the time apart or how great you
know the experience will be for your son or daughter, it is still sad
to have them away from home for that length of time.
My husband and I were so excited about this
opportunity for Amy, and we encouraged her 100 percent to pursue
spending a year abroad. Yet when the time came for her to leave, the
tears flowed. And they flowed again when we got her first phone call
and her first letter, and read her first article, and opened the
package of presents she sent at Christmastime, and …you get
the idea. So have that box of Kleenexes handy.
Amy
Renes shows off her new Amsterdam bag. She is sitting in front of
the Rijksmuseum (National Museum) during a visit to Amseterdam.
Exchange
student Amy Renes stands with a life-size Delft porcelain cow at a
Delft factory in the city of Delft, Netherlands. The city is known
for its porcelain industry, especially blue china.
Another thing you can expect is to have your faith
strengthened. It takes faith to believe that your teenager won’t
get on the wrong airplane, misplace her passport, get lost in the
middle of Amsterdam, or have a bike crash. It takes faith to believe
that her host family will accept her as one of their own and will
help her make all of the necessary adjustments to a new country,
culture, language and school. Above all, it takes faith that your
daughter will actually want to come home again and not decide to stay
in Europe because she’s having so much fun.
More than anything, you can expect to feel a great
deal of pride. My husband and I are extremely proud of all four of
our daughters and how unique and special each one is. That pride is
reinforced when you see your child seizing an opportunity like this
and making the difficult and - at times - painful adjustment to
living in another country.
Finally, you can expect that your child will never
be the same again. Brian and I both spent time in Japan when we were
in high school, in addition to having lived in other countries as
adults. So we know how this year will help Amy grow and learn and how
it will shape her perspective on virtually everything in life from
this point on.
I had the incredible opportunity of visiting Amy
for a week over Easter vacation. What a great time we had! I was able
to meet her host parents and friends, visit her school, listen to her
speak Dutch (and not understand a word of what she was saying!), and
do some sight-seeing. We had so much fun simply being together after
seven months. More than anything, though, I was able to see firsthand
exactly how well she’s doing, and how this year was definitely
the right decision for her.
Yes, there were some tears as we once again had to
say good-bye. But they were more tears of joy than tears of sorrow
(and we remembered to have the box of Kleenexes close by).
Now, if only we can convince Amy's 15-year old
sister that she doesn’t really need to follow in her footsteps
and go to some faraway country during her junior year!
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